By Ron Sitton

(Nov. 23) - The discount stores of suburbia started selling Christmas gear the day after the Halloween candy disappeared, but I really don't get into the season until Thanksgiving. Granted, I celebrate the majority of my siblings birthdays (and my own) from October to December, but those are individual, not group, celebrations.

As a kid, we'd go to Harrison every Thanksgiving because Papaw's birthday fell on Nov. 23, a week after mine. However, that didn't seem any different from the normal routine as we drove up to see Nana and Papaw at least once or twice every month through my high school years. My sister Aronna and I flew to Atlanta one Thanksgiving when I was an undergrad, but that was the routine until I moved to Tennessee for graduate school.

From Knoxville, I'd travel to Atlanta for Thanksgiving and back to North Little Rock for Christmas. A product of a split family, I've always had to juggle where to spend the holidays, sometimes even going to multiple places to see the different members. It prepared me for marriage.

Since returning to Arkansas, I've normally attended Thanksgiving in Maumelle with Aronna and her family. After getting married, I spent Thanksgiving eve at my father-in-law's, Thanksgiving dinner at Aronna's and Thanksgiving supper at my mother-in-law's. Under normal circumstances, that would be a lot of turkey.

Luckily, I didn't marry into normal circumstances. My mother-in-law refuses to serve the traditional Thanksgiving, much to everyone's delight. Instead of turkey and dressing, there's shrimp, scallops and cheesecake, along with crab-stuffed mushrooms from Tanya. I must admit, I've gorged the last two years, which helps explain the expanding waistline.

But this year things are changing. First and foremost, I can't gorge until the doctor says it's OK to eat dairy and fats. I didn't exactly follow directions last night at my father-in-law's due to the large bowl of cheese dip and the mini-wraps of cream cheese, feta cheese, chives and cranberries - yum! - that distracted me. However, we did eat Papa John's stew, a vegetarian meal that was rather tasty.

Aronna and crew are eating with her brother-in-law's bunch today, so we're hosting Thanksgiving for the first time in our marriage. I even mowed the front yard yesterday. :)

After only a little deliberation, we decided on the non-traditional Thanksgiving dinner instead of the turkey, i.e. we're going to eat what we're thankful for. For appetizers, Tanya's portobello, crab and gouda dip that previously graced mushrooms will now top pita chips. She also made a mandarin-poppy salad, while Mom's bringing a fruit salad.

Luckily, Hilda's bringing the pan-fried shrimp and scallops. Tanya's prepared cumin-encrusted Tilapia or turkey cutlets with a choice of a sweet pineapple or spicy chipotle-lime sauce to go along with French bread. Afterwards, Hilda's made a lemon-cream cheese pie and I'm making a chocolate delight.

What's a person supposed to do when hosting? I think the first thing is to make sure everyone's having a good time. I've always approached having a good time from a "me-first" perspective, i.e. if I'm having a good time, others will have a good time; if they're not having a good time, at least I'm having a good time.

This self-centered perspective works for marriage, dating and most other aspects of life. Of course my proof relies on a postulate: A person can seldom change another's attitude, but a person can always change his or her own attitude. When smiles abound, happiness follows.

I'm thankful for life, my wife and son, my family, my friends I choose as family, non-traditional Thanksgivings, the opportunity to talk with loved ones miles away through the Internet, and, of course, the Razorbacks. I've even been accused of a self-centered perspective on tomorrow's Arkansas-LSU game, but today's about Thanksgiving, so I'll have to get into that then instead of now.